Sweet Dreams Pt 2

Little Girl: *Pouts* Don’t treat me like a little kid!

Huxian: Oh never, my lady.

*Stopping for a moment, he wipes away her tears, giving her a peck on the forehead before holding her tight*

Little Girl: I hate you sometimes, with your pretty boy face. Meany, dummy, bad kitty, jerk… stupid Hue…. I...still love you. Idiot.

*Unable to stop himself, Huxian just smiled and nuzzled the top of the girl’s head. It wouldn’t be the first time she had called him an ‘idiot’ after all. Even so, he could never find himself insulted or annoyed by the word from her. It practically felt like a pet name as much as ‘Kitty’ was.*

Little Girl: *Pout* Treating me like a kid again…

Huxian: But you react so adorably!

Little Girl: *Pout, Teary eyed* NOT ADORABLE! I am beautiful woman, can't you see that?! I'm not a little kid, I’m a woman!!!

Huxian: Even the most beautiful of fair maidens in the world can be the most adorable, you know. It’s even somewhat thrilling to find what makes them so. Can you blame me for wishing to see the true nature shine through so brightly under the layers of beauty, dignity and poise? Besides, its fun. Isn’t it why we tease your daddy? To see his reactions? ...Though in his case its more overreactions.

Little Girl: *Puffs up cheeks*…..Don't feel like talking to you anymore….

Huxian: Ah, my heart aches. I suppose I’ll just have to find an offering to change your mind. After all, the great Lady Demoness must only have the best of the best, correct?

*The little girl clung on the young man resting her head agent his heart as if listening for something other than his heart, a little annoyed she turns her head away from him still buried in his chest. Shaking his head with a light sigh he continues forward in the direction home. It wouldn’t be the first time she had been in such a mood. He’d find something for her to forgive him later. After all, she often disliked being thought of as a ‘child’ or ‘adorable’ but, honestly, he couldn’t help it. He hadn’t been lying when he said he liked to see that side of her, but she always seemed to think he was saying that because she was ‘little’ or a ‘kid’, not because he just liked to see all sides of her personality, even if the girl herself denied it.

Bringing it up more would only have her sulk more, however, so he kept quiet, carrying her until they reached the door, where he gently blew in her ear*

Huxian: Forgive the impertinence, My Lady, but would you mind opening the door? Or would you rather I use my tails? Or would that end up with one as your hostage again?

Little Girl: …. They’re MY tails to do what I want with.

*The child clapped twice causing the door to open with a slight creek.*

Huxian: Thank you, My Lady. Although…I’m almost scared to bring out my tails now. I might have you permanently attached to them. I’m unsure a fox-tail scarf looks too impressive when the rest of the Huli Jing is still attached to it. I’m sure you’ll figure out how to make it work, though, my maniacal genius.

Little Girl: *Overlayed voice* Keep talking and i might be interested in a fur coat.

Huxian: Oh? Do you dislike being flattered so much? Or do you like it too much? *Half evil grin* Don’t tell me you’re shy now. What is that word from your father’s country…..’Tsundere’, was it?

*The little girl's eyes switch to something a little crazed for a moment, voice becoming darker, her small pearly fang growing slightly*

Little girl: You know, I’m at biting distance from your throat, right fluff? Keep winding up a wolf and you’ll be bitten. Those tea coloured eyes don't scare me.

Huxian: But it’s so much fun! *Pouting* Oh, fine, I’ll behave….a bit. Do I still get to tease your dear old dad? I’m afraid that the temptation would just be too much otherwise.

Little Girl: *Tuning her head away* Do what you will it’s not business of mine…

*Huxian tried not to roll his eyes. Seriously, it was like there was a sulk party going on in the girl’s head. Better not suggest it, though - she really might go for the jugular and Huxian would rather not have to accidentally hurt her by keeping her away from ‘accidentally’ killing him. He liked to dance with death sometimes, but he liked being on her good side a bit more. Not that he was on her good side right now with the conversation from before. His chest still hurt without the distraction...

Stepping into the kitchen, Huxian let down the upset child. The newly formed tension between the two was enough to summon the mothers attention.*

Mother: … how was play time? Are you hungry dinner will be ready in thirty-

Little Girl: I’m going to put away my things and wash up. I’ll help mama in a bit.

Mother: Alright, take your time…. *Sigh*

*Huxian washed his hands in preparation to aid the child's mother in preparing the food.*

Mother: You know the old saying ‘Happy wife, happy life’, right? So, what happened?   

*Huxian flinched slightly at the mother’s words, ears folding back a little*

Huxian: I….Its….

*’It's nothing’ was on his lips, but he couldn’t bring himself to tell the lie to one of his friends who had been so kind to him since….well...since. Resting his hands on the sink, he sighed*

Huxian: We were talking, earlier and she...she was asking me if I would trade her for Li….for….for Her….If I could even love her while Li….while She….still has a place. I’ve….for a while I’ve been asking her to ask me when she’s a bit older, but…..its...maybe it’s selfish, it’s not even for her sake….I….I just need some time. It’s not even really been that long….At least, it doesn’t feel it yet. My heart still hurts….

*He presses a palm to one of his eyes*

Huxian: At the same time, how could she think I’d ever willingly sacrifice her life to bring back Li….to bring Her back? I don’t want that. I don’t want to lose anyone else I care for. I just….

*Sighing, he lowers his hands to the sink once again, ducking his head*

Huxian: Sometimes I don’t want to feel any more….but then I remember how much I love you and your husband and your daughter and I regret ever thinking that either. But I keep hurting you all too…

*He snorts, self depreciation*

Huxian: As you can guess, I upset her again….*Sighing*

Mother: *Shaking her head* No… No… I think your getting things confused here… but first, answer me this: if you could bring back your late wife, would you? Knowing that an equal or greater life would be needed as penance? By all means, its possible to bring back a life, restored back to how it was before death, but that is the work of the gods, not ours.

And the price of doing such? Well, there will always be a debt that must be paid.

Second, would you be saying ‘ask me when she’s a bit older’? She is older  - well, at least her mind is, unfortunately. That might be our fault for raising her as such. But, hypothetically, if her body matched her mind, would you be telling her to wait or would you have already laid your hands on her.

I don't think you realise it, but your both walking on eggshells around each other. She’s trying to do the best for you, putting your needs above hers. Holding back that fact that she wants to claim your heart and mind for herself. But, deep down, ‘they’ know that they never will, not completely. She has one of my gifts, unfortunately…. Seeing into one’s soul. She’s curious, never truly able to trust your words so… she’s checking… trying to see if you like her that little bit more.. Or how much space she’s occupying in your heart.

I guess it her child-like nature that’s getting impatient, frustrated that it’s not happening faster. *Chuckle*

I can practically hear it - ‘he still doesn't think of me as an adult or a potential mate, what am I going to do if he can't love me? Even if I get older, can’t I be enough…? No that’s not it. I’ll never be enough. He loved her too much…. So if it doesn't work by the time I’m older… no matter what he says, I’ll perform a miracle. I’ll bring her back so he can be happy. I’ll just make it look like I got sick and ‘rest’ somewhere by the temple… its ok as long as he can smile happily again, so he doesn't have to wear that fake smile mask any more… and I’ll just watch over him, as long as he's happy.’

I’m raising an adult trapped in a child's body… she understands too much and there's nothing to be done about it. Thus I can't fight it. What I can do guide you both. So tell me, fluff.

If you could find a way to regain what was taken away, would you? Or if she had an adult body would you be treating her the same?

*Huxian just shank back, eyes wide in utter horror at the thought of the girl actually going through with sacrificing herself for a ‘miracle’. It might have just been the mother’s musing of her daughters thoughts, but the mother was an Valkyrie, whose power enabled her to see into one’s heart. If she mused this, it was entirely possible the girl had thought it. He shook his head in denial.*

Huxian: No! I won't let her do something so foolish! Li…..Lihua *the word is bit out, even if it tore him to say it* is dead because of my own idiocy. No one should sacrifice themselves to right a wrong that was mine in the first place. How could I ever be happy if someone I love killed themselves to right a mistake of mine? What kind of ‘Miracle’ would that be? It would just be a curse to me! I don't want her to die!

*The child’s mother's eyes flickered as he hugged himself*

Mother: Finally you said her name.

Huxian: I could never smile a real smile if that happened. How could I? I wouldn’t even be able to look you or Engetsu or even Li-Lihua in the eye, knowing that I’d bought a life at the cost of someone else….especially not with her life….

*He looked away*

Mother: Why not?

*Huxian glanced at her, knowing he wouldn't need to say a word for the mother to know exactly why. After all, one doesn’t read a heart with words. Taking a shaky breath, he looks away once more, swallowing as he attempted to calm himself from the horror and self disgust from the previous question*

Huxian: A...as for the other...hypothetical question...I would still need time. If I….If I love again, I want to do so without feeling guilty. I want to….I’m not strong enough to lose anyone I love like that again. I….

*His voice drops to a whisper*

Huxian: I do love her, you know. I just…It hurts….

Mother: *Sigh closed eyes* Then it’s still too early for…. She’s crying in her hiding space upstairs calm yourself and go to her.

And, as for the matter of both of your current states, you may need to give in here an there, and attempt to get used to type of love you both feel, whether its holding each other, like a couple would or something as innocent a kiss… baby steps, yes…? But you must move, dear.

You never know, it might hurt less than you think.

*Taking a deep breath, Huxian closed his eyes and, swallowing, shakily responded*

Huxian: ...I….I’ll….I’ll try….

The talk seems to trigger something within him, be it good or bad, it was unsure, but the talk did help to some degree. As he walked up stairs, he could hear the girl’s faint sobs. Resting on the wall for a moment, taking a breath, he could hear them.

Little Girl: I-I have to stop crying…. I have to stop crying. It’s not about me…. *Woo*

Older Girl: *Sob sob* Kitty’s the one who’s hurting and still I acted out. I have no right to cry, I can’t be childish not now.

Young woman: It’s ok, I’ll just apologize… I’ll just…. But what if he hates me now…? What would I do…?

Little Girl: I’m gonna be alone again…. It….its fine if Ro’s all alone. We’re used to it… right?

Young Woman: Yeah…. We’re used to the dark. We push and push… it’s all the same, right? He’ll go away in the end right…? We’ll just-

*Huxian, listened in, fist clenched as he listened to the girl’s cry. He wanted to open the door rush in and tell her she was wrong in her thoughts, but he just stood there, something rooting him to the spot. He wanted to speak, but the words wouldn't come out.*

Little Girl: Its fine. I won’t push anymore… I’ll give up.  

Older Girl: Yeah… it’s for the best…

Young Woman: ...it’s better this way… it’s better… Kitty….

*He could hear her cry again, this time her soft cries were a little louder only to be smothered by a what he assumed was her burrowing into her pillow. Whatever it was that seemed to hold him in place shattered. He couldn’t allow himself to let her feel so distraught. Taking a breath, he gathered himself, pushing open the door. Transforming himself into a nine tailed fox, he ran into the room, leaped onto the bed and pounced on the girl so the bed jolted them both. For a moment it was a chaos of pillows, blankets and fur*

Little Girl: *Crying* W-what do you want?! W-why are you here?! I said I-

Huxian: You know, as a fox, I’m a wild animal. We’re horrible at doing what people tell us to do.

*As he spoke he began to transform into a younger version of his previous for, the mothers words slowly playing in the back of his mind*

Mother: ….attempt to get used to type of love you both feel… Something as innocent a kiss… baby steps, yes…?

*Huxian sat back slightly, looking down at the girl laying with tearful eyes, before he lay down on top on her, his nose near the girl’s, the girl looked to the side burying her face in the pillow, trying her best to feebly push him away. There wasn’t much power to it, it seemed, though Huxian stubbornly refused either way, merely sinking his weight further, staring at her with determined eyes.*

Huxian: And if ‘doing as I’m told’ only makes someone I care for cry….I’m more inclined to ignore it. So, that in mind, why wouldn’t I be here? This is where I belong.

Little Girl: I-Idiot… it was my fault ok… I won’t push for you to love me anymore, I’ll be good so-  

Huxian: Then stop pushing me away.

*With one of his tails, he poked at the hand that tried to shove him off, raising a brow*

Huxian: You know, if I wanted to leave, I’d have done it by now. If you were truly pushing too much, why do you think I’m still here? I assure you, it's not because I’m being contrary.

*Carefully, Huxian shifted of her, pulling the pillow away from her face, laying down so he could see her eyes, nose touching hers.*

Huxian: It’s not that I have nowhere to go. It’s that there’s nowhere else I want to be.

*He touched her chest with the tip of a finger over her heart, giving her a warm, heartfelt smile*

Huxian: Its because right there is home.

Little Girl: *Looking away before closing her eyes tightly* It’ll be too much it would be better if ‘We’ just gave up on you… our feelings would just cause trouble so we’ll behave and give up on-

Huxian: I love you, you know.

Little Girl: As family, and as your friends daughter… it’s fine.

Huxian: *More determined* No. I love you. I love all of you.

Little Girl: As family-

*He leaned forwards and kisses her, cutting off her words*

Huxian: No. I. Love. You.

*Her eyes seemed to widen, the faint linger of his lips on hers, made her heart pound. Blushing she tried pushing him away again, but again he stubbornly stayed put.*

Little Girl: No. You just feel sorry for me. You can't do that kitty, you’ll give me hope and I’m trying to give up on you. It’s fine! I’m fine, so you don't have to force yourself…. I’m fine.

Huxian: It’s not that at all. Have I never told you? I existed in darkness for what seems like a long time. It was your voice that reached me, you know. It was you who gave me the chance to live again. You give me that reason. What reason would I have to exist in a cursed world that doesn’t have you in it? You’re my light in the darkness. And nothing, no one, not even Lihua, could ever replace that. I want to stay by your side. So...do you mind if I’m selfish? Can you let me….let me stay with you?

Little Girl: … Hue...Is is it alright if I like… if I love you? Can I be in love with you?  

*Gently, Huxian takes one of her hands, threading his fingers through hers*

Huxian: I’m not sure how worthy I’ll be. But, I want to. My salvation.

*They stayed like that for a while, a thought running through his mind, ‘This...I...I can handle this much. One day, I’ll be able to let the past go. But for now, let me have this’. It was comforting, being in her arms like that, she ran her tiny fingers through his thick hair, undoing the ribbon. A thick curtain of hair rained on them both but they didn't seem to mind, she and the veil of sadness that covered her face seemed to lift. She cried once more, not in despair, but with a small glimmer of hope.  It was enough for him, it was enough for her.

*Down stairs, the Girl’s mother sat, pulling back from looking in the eyes of her feathered beast. Content with the outcome of the pair’s actions, she set to work setting the table.*

Mother: Baby steps, sweet children. One step at a time.

Feathered Beast: *Annoyed scoff* They’re still children, if you ask me. And that has nothing to do with their ages.  

Mother: *Chuckle* Yes, that is true, but they’re cute like that. All we need to do is watch over them. But, right now, let them enjoy their cuddle session. Especially as my little flower finally got her first confession. Should I have made red rice?

Feathered Beast: ….. Master’s not going to like their new found closeness.

Mother: *Chuckle* Just leave him to me. I’ll bring him around.

*Back in the Little girls room*

Little Girl: Hue?  

Huxian: Hm?

*The pair were clinging to one another. The girl casting the same spell to make her older once again. Huxian merely shifted a little to accommodate the older form, before settling beside her again, not quite willing to leave the comforting embrace.

Young Woman: Can I be selfish this once?

Huxian: Considering I’m doing the same….I have no right to deny that of you. Go ahead.

*Her eyes sparkled as she looked though her eyelashes, an embarrassed red seemed to tint her cheeks.*

Young Woman: Can… if its too much trouble, you don't have to, but…. Can you kiss me again… please?

Huxian: Hm….the effort of moving from here….can I….

*He paused just long enough to tease her, but not long enough for her to attempt to stutter her way out. Before she could say anything, he gave her another quick kiss, smiling*

Huxian: Looks like it wasn’t too much trouble at all.

Young Woman: *Deep Blush* Eep!!

*Despite the squeak, Huxian could only grin more, since it was hard not to notice the pleased wagging of a tail not his own. The young woman buried her face in his chest attempting not to let her embarrassed expression be noticed she mumbled.*

Young woman: Y-you're enjoying this too much… meany, sadist!!! Stop picking on kids.

Huxian: *Dark chuckle* But I thought you said you were a beautiful woman?

Young Woman: Sh-shut up!

[End]