Written Memories Pt 8

Dear Diary,

It has been a while since I have been able to write in here - about three months, I believe, since the day that I was named the spar partner to Rozyus, the Monarch of the Children of Two and became close friends to him. As it is, much has happened in that time that I simply have not been able to sit and write. It has been quite the conundrum, being unable to put my thoughts into words. As such, it has been on my mind all this time. Today is the first time that I’ve truly had time to myself. Funny how I had been quite capable of writing in this journal while managing my godly duties, but unable to do so with just adding new relations. It is strange how life works.

Those thoughts aside, one should do one’s duty and report one’s observations, correct? After all, I have only a short amount of time before my dear friend awakens from slumber. He is laying only a few feet away from me now, resting in gentle dreams. I do hope that my writing will not disturb him.

Since my involvement with Rozyus and the Children of Two, I’ve been in a much better position to observe them, how other gods interact with them and how things have changed since the trial three months ago. In the grand scheme of things, three months is hardly long enough to change millennia worth of preconceptions, but I have seen some changes. The older gods are quite stubborn in their views, of course. It is almost funny that they would be so stuck in their ways when the Eldest primordials appear almost flexible. Of course, the older gods do outnumber them significantly and hold the ear of much of the public. As such, many younger gods are still exceptionally wary, some even going as far as refusing to be in the same room or making segregation. While this at least has prevented another occurrence like the one that caused the trial, it is still causing may tensions that could be avoided if they just attempted to have a good relationship. After all, should people be treated well, they respond in kind. And even if you were looking at it from the ‘superior to inferior’ point of view, as much as I hate it, would it not make sense to treat a dog well so that they might be loyal? They would certainly not bite the hand that feeds them if only the gods who see the others as inferior perhaps thought in such a way.

I would, of course, prefer they be treated as equals, but I’m not looking for impossible miracles in only a short time. I am a god, but I’m certainly not known for being a messiah.

On the other hand, I and a few of my friends, such as Susanoo, Hephaestus and Venus have been doing our best to try and convince some of our peers to treat Rozyus and his kin better. We haven’t met with resounding success, but we have at least managed to convince some people to try. Those that have have at least managed somewhat good relations. It’ll be slow going, but if we can at least convince our generation, who have started to gain more and more influence over the mortal realms, then we have a better chance of winning people over. After all, reputation certainly does aid in influence.

Speaking of reputation, it seems that the rumours I have heard of Mother’s recommendation for Hero have come to pass - recently I was approached with the official honour of becoming the Hero of Fate, with all the pomp and fanfare that the position is due (Although admittedly, while it was public enough that it has certainly increased my reputation, part of me wishes that the initial message could have been delivered in private. I suppose that the reason was to prevent anyone from undermining the decision due to my age if many people are already backing up the testimony. The official ceremony, which will at least please the more stuffy of deities, will take place soon enough. I am glad that much of my more recent training has been in politics and emotional control, otherwise I’m quite certain that the ceremony might bore me to death.

Still, boredom kills no one. In fact, beyond the pomp, I actually feel….quietly confident about becoming the Hero of Fate. Perhaps it is simply that I’ve know the speculations for a while, or have always felt Parame’s confidence in me, but I do not feel as scared as I thought I would be. I still have much room to grow, of course, but I believe that I am at a level to handle the journey that this destiny will lead me to. I can only grow stronger from here. My road, of course, will hardly be easy for me. The true journey only begins once the ceremonies have ended, and my path will make it hard for me to stay at their side. Will they be alright without me? I know that they are all strong people, but they are very dear to me. It is only right that I worry for them, as they worry for me, wouldn’t you say? But this is something that I must do, for all our sakes. Not to mention I can feel that my companions are confident in me, too, that I might become a great Hero. There is no way that I can be nervous, knowing that I have such people supporting me as well. I will do my utmost to make Mother, Rozyus and my other friends proud to support me as Hero. With that, I only hope that I, too, might be able to repay them for everything they have done for me. They believe in me, so likewise, I must place my belief in them.

*Pausing in their writing for a moment, Inari glances over to their sleeping companion for a long moment. He looks so very peaceful, cuddled into his pillows as he was that Inari couldn’t help the soft look that came over their face. It was only after a minute or so that they realise they had been staring, and, with a flush, they shyly return to the diary*

I...also have something of a confession to make. This is a diary of observations, of course, and making note of changes in myself is also an observation. True that this journal is only for my own eyes, but one should be truthful in what one observes, right? It seems that I might….possibly….have some….extra emotional attachments to Rozyus that I previously considered. I have, since meeting him, felt that we might be linked in some way. Now, I’m quite positive that we might be connected by a red string of fate. Perhaps I should be more accusing of Mother and Venus, but I’m not sure that either of them are involved in the feelings that have been growing in me.

It’s somewhat ironic that I’d come to realise this only after the message of my formal acceptance as a Hero. With this, my time will be tied up even more than usual, so there will be less time to spend with him. But I know that I can’t turn down this opportunity, either.

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder. It seems I’ll find out soon enough if it’s true. Not to say that I wont keep in correspondence, of course (is it possible to die from getting no information?) but I think that, if my feelings really are what I think they are, then I’ll soon find out. Hopefully excessive fondness does not end up with hearts exploding. That would be a messy and ignoble end for a hero. But if I’m right about the red string that ties us together, then even if we part for a short time, it will not be forever. There is no way that I would leave someone dear to me for eternity.

Though I’m told I’m stubborn. Should I be mistaken about the red string….well, I would come back anyway. Who else would be my snuggle buddy/object of teasing affection otherwise?

*Feeling a tad bit too flustered to continue writing for now, Inari took a break from the journel, doing their best to calm the flushing of their face as they absently ran their fingrers through their hair in a semi nervous tell, glancing back to Rozyus to be abseolutely sure that the boy was not spying on what was being written (they hadn’t revealed those thoughts about the boy to his face yet, after all. Thankfully, he was still fast asleep. Relieved, Inari sat back in their seat again, absently brading their hair a little as they considered what they should say next. Perhaps something to lighten the mood? Well, no, this was an oobservation diary, not one for telling jokes- Oh!

Pausing, Inari glances at the hair they are brading, the tail of which trailing over their shoulder eligently. That was something that they should mention….*

As well as my change in situation and emotions, there have been a few new changes to my appearance as well. This is not to say I have settled on a gender, of course. I enjoy the freedom of being able to change into who I feel and I don’t think I’d ever be comfortable confined to a single gender. No, the change to my appearance is not quite so great. Of late, I have been doing something different to my hair, on the suggestion of Rozyus. It would seem that he likes my hair when it is loose. He has stated to me that he finds it pretty. Like a waterfall of stardust…

*They tail off a little in their writing, the brush ending in almost a trail off as they realise how flustered that mere sentence makes them. With a muffled sound of mortification that they had even revealed that in the diary, never mind out loud, they hide their now red face in their hands, feeling as if they were blushing all over. Shyly, they glance over at the sleeping boy once more from behind their fingers, hoping that Rozyus did not see just how flustered they had become. They tried their best to seem unflappable to the outside world, they would be utterly motified if the object of their affection realised just how much of a dork they could truly be, that a simple compliment to their hair reduced them to an embarrassed puddle even months after the comment itself

Meeping quietly, they couldn’t help but remember the day that it happened…*

--- Memory ---

*The training room was filled with electric energy as the two combatants rushed at each other, blades flashing in the ethereal lighting of the room. Each clash of a blade sung a symphony as they moved, every cry of focus was a war of energy, determination raging to be victorious over another. The utter focus the two had on each other, to overcome the obstacle, to emerge as the ultimate victor making any observer fade into the background. They ignored as they panted for breath, they ignored the burning of their lungs and the sweat pouring from them. None of that was important right now, not when one distraction, one wrong move could separate them from victory, could drive them to defeat.*

Rozyus: *Dark Chuckle* Why don't you admit defeat I believe I won this match, no?

Inari: A match is only won when the opponent is writhing at your feet. As you see, I stand still.

Rozyus: You say that yet you're getting tired, you're beginning to get desperate. Your swings say as much. Just say ‘I’m done’ already. Unless you're in for more punishment *Grin*

Inari: Oh, you just said that yourself! You must be desperate if you’re saying that to me. *Grinning* Of course, if you still want to play, I’m happy to show you how rough my play can be…

Rozyus: Oh well, aren't we naughty, oh great deity. *Flirty Tone*

Inari: Well, you’re the one who speaks of punishment. My my, what has Venus been teaching you?

Rozyus: *Chuckle* The same lessons as you, ‘dear,’ but I dare speculate that she's been giving you a masterclass behind my back. You’re more beautiful than you were the last time you were home. A refined sort of eros, I think. It's almost deadly. But not as deadly as my blade! A lot’s at stake on this little match. I will win, even if I have to pin you down to do it. *Coy look*  

Inari: Interesting proposal. However-

*Quickly, they had the other with their blade almost at the other’s throat if it wasn’t for the boy’s reflexes, an almost vicious, semi-sadistic grin, freer than many of their smiles, gracing their face, eyes glinting with their determination of pure enjoyment of the battle*

Inari: -You have to catch me first, little flower.

Rozyus: No fair!

Hooded Figure: Venus….. What on earth did you-?

Venus: Now, before you say anything…. No, I didn't teach them this - that’s all on them!

Voice: Then explain the Eros vibe in the room?

Venus: What, my presence?

Hooded Figure: You know exactly what we mean.

Venus: *Flirty chuckle* Like I say, it's all them. Trust me, when they grow up, you better keep an eye out.

Voice: Oh dear…

Inari: All if fair in love and war, so they say! So suck it up and prepare to take defeat with a smile!

Rozyus: Hump! If I go down, then you're going with me!!!

*The battle continued, but only for a little longer. A burst of energy that Inari had held back until the moment it would be most advantageous meant that one quick movement, knocking the other of balance allowed Inari to dash forwards, a twist of the blade sending Rozyus’ sword from his grip. True to the boy’s word, however, he refused to go down without a fight, grabbing at Inari’s robes. Not about to allow themself to be undefended, they went with the momentum, using it to roll over the boy rather than end up smacking into him and onto their feet once more, blade held at the ready, but breath coming out in harsh pants and hair falling around his face, the tie having been yanked out after getting caught in the ending scuffle. Inari ignored the silver in their view, instead positioning as if they were going to stab through the other, blade positioned at the other’s throat.*

Inari:....Yield.

Rozyus: N-never *Huff Huff*

*There was a sound of two hard clapps, gaining the attention of the pair. Looking up at their respective mentors, they got to their feet.*

Voice: Lords above, call it a tie and share the plate of goods already.

Hooded Figure: *Laughs* Seriously. All this for a plat of Baklava.

Rozyus: It not any baklava! Mama made it, so it’s extra scrummy!!! And besides, there’s only nine pieces left! We can't evenly split nine so… it's a duel for the last piece.

Voice: …..

Venus:....

Hooded Figure:...

Voice, Venus, Hooded Figure: REALY?!!!

Inari: *Head tilted innocently* What? That’s fair, isn’t it? The victor gets the spoils, that’s how all wars and battles work.

Hooded Figure: Imbeciles.

Voice: Tell me about it…

*Venus, walked towards the plate of goods, cutting the coveted good and slicing it in two*

Venus: Now. Quit bitching, eat up and move on. Ok? *Dark smile*

Inari: *Sighing* Ah….so the fun was rumbled….how sad. Ah well, at least there is baklava from this.

*Offering a cheeky grin to Venus - it was obvious that Inari apparently had enjoyed the challenge more than the snack idea and had just gone along with Rozyus’ idea to battle for the last slice from amusement - Inari hummed brightly as they sheathed their sword and sauntered over to the plate, long silvery hair swaying as they did so, to take the offered snack, pretending that Venus was not looking at them as if they were the most contrary thing in existence.*

*The boy had followed, after the child, sitting agent to them, as they reached out they couldn't help but stare at the rear sight, so much so that, the young god seemed to notice.*

Inari: *Pausing mid bite* Ah…..is…..something wrong?

Rozyus: N-not at all, it's just that in the dimness of this poorly lit room… it almost looks like starlight, forgive me *Reach out to touch a lock*

With your hair down you look more captivating than usual… I really like it styled like this… *Cute smile*

Inari: W-wha…?

*Completely taken aback, both by the complement to their one true vanity, and the expression on the other’s face, Inari’s face flushed a pretty pink that had nothing to do with the exertion from the previous bout. Flustered, they turned their head away slightly, toying with their hair with nervous hands*

Inari: Ah…..y-you like it? I-I mean, of course, it would be foolish of me not to take care of my hair…..but, I….heh…..no one’s complimented my hair like that before….

*Shyly, they glance over to the boy again through the curtain of hair*

Inari: Do you….um…..really like it? Like this, I mean? Uh, though less sweaty, I suppose…..heh….

Rozyus: Of course! I would have said it if I didn’t… Ah! Your face looks flushed! *Touches forehead* You don't seem to have a fever… Are you hot? Should I get a drink for you-?

Inari: Ah, no, it’s nothing! I’m fine! *Waving off the other quickly* I’m…..uh…..just a little flushed after the fight is all…..you’re really strong after all! Heh….heh heh….

Voice & Venus: Bullshit.

Hooded figure: They’re actual flustered… Well, I suppose it’ll snow soon.

Venus: ...But its august, isn't it?

Voice: Exactly. *Deadpan*

Inari: *Flatly* I’m right here, asshole.

--- Memory End ---

*Muttering under their breath in a mix of exasperation and embarrassment, Inari could only shake their head as they pushed aside the memory, hoping to calm the blush on their cheeks. They would rather not think about the amount of teasing that got them as they themselves attempted to escape without hurting the feelings of their oblivious spar partner. Instead, they took a few deep breaths, letting themselves regain control over their emotions once more. However, before they could go back to the diary, the boy began to stir a few times before weakening slightly.*

Rozyus: *Sleepy eyes and voice* Morning? Why’z still dark… ‘Nari?

Inari: That’s because it’s not morning yet, Rozy. Well, unless you count a little beyond the dead of night as morning. There’s still plenty of time for sleep. I’m sure that Morpheus still has many a dream for you.

Rozyus: ...How can night be dead….? Silly…. You should sleep too, ‘k? *Puppy yawn, cling to Inari*

Inari: I will. I only have a few more things to write before I turn in.

Rozyus: Zzzzzz.

*Chuckling, Inari couldn’t help but watch as the other fell into sleep once again for a moment, before shaking their head and turning back to the journal once again. Picking up the brush, they considered how to finish the entry. After a moment, they began to write once more*

My feelings aside, the biggest change in my life is indeed the formal invitation to become a Hero. As one might deduce from my writings, there is no way that I can turn down from this decision, both for my sake and the sake of my loved ones. The road will not be easy. The path will be treacherous and filled with hidden potholes. However, I shall not be swayed. I know that I have the support of those who care for me. I will not let them down.

Be sure, however, that my observations will continue, and will write more as I have the chance to do so, but know that my heart is set. I will be victorious. For all their sakes.

Farewell, until next time.

[END]