Huxian: I’m...not sure what happened...precisely. I’m not sure how well I could explain.
*He worried a lip for a moment as he tried to think how to put it into words*
Huxian: ...It was like...seeing another you from your eyes...but not Thorn...and not Puppy….Ro...what...what do you know about...reincarnation?
Rodessa: ..So…. I assume… You met Rozyus then….
Hue, I want you to forget about it… at least for now. The way I see it is the past is the past.
It affects our future, sure, but the future is vague, the now is a gift. That’s why it’s called the ‘present’. I can't help him yet and neither can you. The only thing we can do is wait until we can.
Huxian: I...I suppose so. There isn’t much we can do if we don’t even really know why its eve happening, frustrating as that may be.
Rodessa: Like I said, let's forget it. When that bridge comes, we’ll cross it until then…
*The girl reached out toward the young man, skillfully undoing his shirt; before pulling him on top of her
Rodessa: Weren't you going to make me-
Huxian: Wow, emotional whiplash.
*Snorting ever so slightly, he grasped her hands, loosening them from his top, raising an eyebrow.*
Huxian: I’m quite sure the deal was that you had to hold still, not act as though you’re trying to top from the bottom.
*Even so, it was a little difficult to have himself so easily slip back into the previous mood he was in. After all, saying ‘forget about it’ didn’t automatically cause amnesia. The knowledge of reincarnation, that a fragment of a past life was searching for something, or rather, someone within Hixian, the heavy thoughts and feelings that had been spoken of...none of these were things that could be easily dropped off into a part of one’s mind so quickly while simultaneously reviving the previous mood they had been in.
Of course, that was probably why Rodessa had acted the way she did, to provide the incentive to be able to push back what had just happened. She obviously either found it somewhat awkward herself, or just didn’t want to lose more time with him. Despite his skills in sorcery, mind reading wasn’t a true ability of his without him possessing another, so he could only guess.
Still, Huxian had spent a lot of time faking his own composure until he tricked himself into being composed, so he could probably fake that the previous event hadn’t happened until he forgot it long enough until he wasn’t actually with his young love. He was many things, but he was not neglectful.
As such, he grinned at her, pinning her hands that he had previously grabbed above her head*
Huxian: Those stay there, kay? Remember the deal?
*The girl seemed to stare at Huxian, seeming now disinterested.*
Rodessa: *Sigh* You're still thinking about it…. You’re faking it… I can see your soul. Don’t try to deny it... and now the mood’s ruined. Again. I’m done.
*Pushing Huxian away, the girl dusted herself off and moved to the edge of the bench, picking up one of the dishes. She sighed as she unwrapped one of plate. Sighing, Huxian moved away as well, a little guilt rushing through him. It wasn’t as though he was doing it to be cruel. It was just a bit too much of an emotional whiplash for them to pretend nothing happened. Even if she didn’t mean it the way it came out, it made him feel like a heel for not being able to discount everything so quickly. He felt worse as he saw her eyes mist up*
Rodessa: *Fighting back tears* He just had to play peekaboo. I finally got to have Hue to myself…. And *Sniff* I’m tired with all this... Can I just have peace…? I’m… I…
*Exasperated the girl too distraught to eat set the food down, and pulled in her knees, the past few days had taken its toll, she tried to speak against but couldn't, hot tears streamed down her cheeks. As she tried not to make a sound she bit her lip agen trying desperately to regain her composure. Even if he felt awful, Huxian couldn’t help but pull her into his arms, hoping, at least, that his physical warmth could at least give her comfort, yet feeling only disgust with himself that there was nothing he could really do to even do that*
Rodessa: *Doll like eyes* I’m so tired... I just want to flirt and be happy with the one I like… I wanna be left alone. Without that senile old man interfering…. Is that too much to ask…? Do I not have the right to be happy…? I guess it doesn't matter anymore… I give up… I’ll do what he wants now… Get married to a man I don't love and rule over a people I care nothing for… The perfect doll… The perfect… doll. *Silent tears*
*Suddenly grabbing her shoulders, Huxian practically shook her, ears flat against his head and eyes ablaze*
Huxian: Don’t you fucking dare!
*When she had started what she was saying, he had been so gobsmacked that he couldn’t say anything. But the more she said, the more disbelief and anger he felt, until finally he couldn’t stand to listen any more. He was putting a stop to such a stupid line of thought once and for all!*
Huxian: So, what, that’s it? That’s as far as you’re willing to fight?! Fuck. That! How can you, who was the one who told me I couldn’t give up, so willing to drop everything just because of a few obstacles? Does your happiness mean so little to you? Does mine? Hell, do you honestly think anyone in your family wants you to be a doll? What the hell can a doll do?! How can a doll lead anyone?! Dammit, I didn’t fall in love with a doll. Even Nikolai didn’t fall for a doll, even if he’s a jealous pup! Well screw it! If you wont fight, then I will! Because I want your happiness above everything! Why else would I even risk the hate of someone I care for because I want to be by your side!
*His own eyes wet, he frantically moved his hands from her shoulders, cupping her cheeks so she would look at him, not even noticing when his own tears started to fall*
Huxian: I love you….I can’t lose anyone else….please...Please don’t….don’t leave me….Please! Please fight! If not for you, then for me. B-because...why else would I even be here? If you just become a doll...then there’s no place for me left. I don’t know about anyone else, but I don’t need a perfect doll. I need you...only you…
*The girl looked up, her eyes still glazed over, she attempted to reach out to him but her and hell back to her side before she could reach him.*
-Short time had passed-
*The pair made there way back into the house. An angry father stood there, ready to rant at the two*
Engetsu: ROZA! WHAT is… the…
*The girl, stood there, barely able to look at him, the doll like state seemed to send a shiver down his spine, with knitted brow the girls mother escorted her back to her room leaving only the two men in the in the room.*
Engetsu: I… What-?
*Voice oddly quiet, the tone in the Huli Jing’s voice cut through Engetsu’s words like a knife*
Huxian: Are you happy now?
Engetsu: *Stoic* What do you mean?
Huxian: For a long time now, you’ve said that Rodessa must do what is good for the clan. That she must marry for their sake, that she must put aside her feelings, her wants, her desires, that she must follow what you want, because you can’t bear to let your child go. Well, does it make you happy? *eyes narrowing* Because of everything that’s been forced on her, everything that’s told to her, everyone’s expectations of her, she thinks she needs to become a perfect doll to bend to your whims. Are you happy, Engetsu? Does it make you happy that because of everything, her spirit is broken?
*His voice was shaking now, hands curling in to fists at his side, even as he trembled, the tears he had though had dried up filling his eyes again.*
Huxian: Are you fucking happy?!
*Rage sweeped over by despair, his words coked and he couldn’t say more, helpless. However, he tried, even though the words forced through the sob was barely audible*
Huxia: ...I’m not...I...why…? I-is this...what you...wanted...?
*The words seemed to cut like a knife, Engetsu looked down centering himself before addressing Huxian once more.*
Engetsu: What am I supposed to do? As leader of a reforged clan, I have an obligation to my people to insure my child becomes a great leader. As her father, it is my duty that she has a worthy partner by her side. Witch the selection of suitors that she repeatedly denied are. I do the best for my child that is the best I can do nothing more… Even… even if it looks like I’m the bad guy I…. I-
Voice: Can go to far?
*Not even really paying attention to the fact that someone had joined them, even if the presence was a divine one, a righteousness bubbling in him breaking through his own upset once again*
Huxian: How. Is this. Good for anyone! How is it for her own good to become a doll?! How is her being the perfect doll even good for your beloved clan?! How does anyone benefit from misery! So you become the bad guy in some self righteous attempt to strengthen the clan, but if that successor is nothing but a broken husk, how is that good for anyone?! It certainly isn’t good for her! Even you know that, or you wouldn’t be sounding so damned pathetic as you try to voice excuses! So tell me, Engetsu. How. Does. This. Help. Anyone!?!
*Grabbing the front of the man’s robes, he forced him to look in his eyes*
Huxian: Gods dammit, Engetsu! She’s your daughter! How can you even call yourself her father - no, how can you say you want to protect her from people like me when you’re the one hurting her the most! You hypocrite!
*Engetsu looked visibly hurt, gritting his teeth and avoiding Huxian’s gaze.*
Engetsu: I never wanted to take things this far, but if I must push, I will… a clan’s happiness over its leader’s is what’s most important, both of us know that… You and I both know what I did nearly destroyed my clan entirely. Do I regret it? No… never.... But I need to fix my mistakes. She needs to follow orders…. If you both wish to continue your relationship… fine… just not at the expense of my clan.
*Rage flashed in Huxian’s eyes and with a snarl, he opened his mouth to cut into the man once again with scathing words. However, the Lady, stepping in front of the young man, stuck her hand out in an attempt to dissuade him from talking, her serious tone was enough to stifle any retort Huxian had.*
Voice: So its you Clan over your child?
Engestu: No, that’s not what…
Voice: Well. Excuse me, but that’s what it sounds like. She’s a tool to fix your mistakes, right?
Engetsu: My Lady, that’s not-
Voice: Well, that’s what it sounds like.
Engetsu: … Lady Parame… I…
Parame: *Sigh* The look in her eyes...do you remember it? ‘Tis not the first time such an expression has graced her, the ‘perfect doll’. I recall that last it appeared you both struggled to cope with what it means to birth a child of two and nearly gave up. She was a smart little thing. She understood what it would mean for her. Thus, she shut herself off, placing herself among dolls to fit in, to be perfect. She even mutilated herself, cutting off her ears and tail in an effort to become that perfect, obedient, normal child
Because that is the child you need to fit into your small minded plan: an obedient doll.
Engetsu: No, I-!
Parame: Then release your child from her burden. YOUR burden. Give her the chance to find her own path, to be her own type of leader.
Engetsu: So I should let our people fall into civil war?
Parame: That is not what I asked of you. What I request is only that you give her the chance to gain their trust under her own power, to give her the chance to fall in love. Because if you keep pushing her, all you will accomplish is crushing a blooming flower in your hand and scattering it to the winds.
Engetsu: *Knitted brow, Sigh* …. Right
*Engetsu looked at Huxian, and back to the Goddess, before nodding in defeat. Calming somewhat, glad that it seemed the goddess was on his side, Huxian nodded to his unexpected ally, before turning to Engetsu once again, stepping forwards, but no longer looking like he wanted to shake him in his teeth by the jugular*
Huxian: Engetsu...you need to understand...Rodessa...its true she’s powerful, and that she’s a child of two. It’s true she’s your daughter...but it’s like Lady Parame says, she’s not you. Your sins should not be visited upon her. Rodessa, though, she’s strong in her own way too. You just...need to trust her. She’s wise, she understands people.
*He put a hand over his chest, above his heart, eyes closed*
Huxian: I remember when I first came here. I was lost. I could have easily allowed Death or his retainers to take me, but a young girl came to me, with understanding, able to reach into that dark void and save me from that hell. Even before I fell in love with her, even before I really knew who she was. And that was just Rodessa being Rodessa. If she can do that, dont you think that, with the support of those who love her, she could even unite this clan, just by being herself?
*His eyes opened once more, determined*
Huxian: Can you believe in her? I do. I believe she can change everything, even if it’s just a little at a time. And even if she didn’t love me, I’d still stand by her, forever. Because I believe in Rodessa and Thorn and Puppy. I believe in her.
*Engetsu ran a hand through his hair, turning away it seemed both of their words had gotten through to some degree. He turned away leaving the room.
With a small sigh Parame giggled silently turning towards Huxian.*
Parame: Don't mind that old dog, our words may have stung but they have gotten though.
Huxian: I hope so...but I…
*He couldn’t help but clench his hands into fists once more*
Huxian: but still...why...why did it have to be because Rodessa reached a breaking point to even get him to listen? It’s all at her expense…I don’t even have any strong feelings towards that clan. It means nothing to me. I just wanted to save Rodessa. But even then, I...I only ended up being the last push to break her instead…
*He ran a hand through his hair helplessly, ears folded back in helplessness*
Huxian: I’m a hypocrite too….I yelled at Engetsu when its partly my fault, too...I wasn’t able to just push aside meeting that fragment of Rozyus and it ruined everything…
Parame: Incorrect. This would have happened either way. As much as she’s been all smiles, she’s just been suppressing the deeper emotions, pretending everything's ok. But, sadly, that’s not how it works. You want to ease her pain? Then the notion that ‘I don’t even have any strong feelings towards that clan,’ and ‘It means nothing to me.’ are far more detrimental to both of them.
Logically speaking, if you were in his position, I doubt anyone would do differently, choosing the least painful path for both parties involved. His intentions were good, but execution was… well less than desirable.
If you feelings for the girl are true, you’ll need to help reforge her clan, they are one in the same after all. It’s a fate she can never run from. But she can mold into something resembling a choice rather than a burden. Understood?
Huxian: I did say I would stand by her side no matter what. I know that, in doing so, that would mean sharing her burden as well. I may not care for them now, but I can learn to care, the way I did before. That’s what it means to be a partner after all, right?
Parame: *Knowing Smile* Indeed. For now, I advise you go to her. In the meantime, I will prepare a bath for the both of you. It should awaken her from her state. Once she is less...catatonic, she will require your love and affection. Just be sure not to cross certain lines *Wink*
*With those parting words the goddess vanished into a column of light. Huxian watched as the light faded into sparks and dissipated before he took a deep breath and made his way into the house once more. He didn’t see Engetsu, thankfully - he doubted such a meeting would result in anything but awkwardness and waste time - and wasn’t stopped as he made his way to Rodessa’s room. Carefully, he knocked on the door, listening in case the girl’s mother (or even Rodessa herself, as much as he knew it was a fleeting hope) would respond*
Huxian: May I enter?
Mother: Come in, I assume your talk with my husband and our Lady is over? If you’ve come for this beautiful doll…. Then I ask that you be careful, she’s as fragile as porslin you know.
*Huxian slipped into the room, shaking his head in response*
Huxian: No matter what she believes, Rodessa is not a doll. In a way, she instead reminds me of a fairytale I once heard from a distant land, of a beauty that was cursed to slumber. I wish to wake her from that curse. But know I would sooner hurt myself than hurt her. I may not be prince charming, but I believe that I care for her enough that it might reach her. Will you...trust me?
Mother: *Small Smile* Then, I’ll leave her in your capable hands.
*The woman gestured for Huxian to take the girl. Stepping forwards, he knelt at the girl’s side, brushing her hair from her face with gentle fingers*
Huxian: I fought for you, you know, just like I said I would. Though right now, your in a place I can’t quite follow. Still, I promised I’d stay by your side, no matter what. So...if you’re too far away, then I will just have to bring you back to me. That’s our promise, right?
Kissing her gently on the cheek, he lifted her into his arms with surprising gentleness, cradling her as if she were more precious than anything else in the world. Letting his natural grace allow his feet to guide them smoothly, he carried her to the room that he knew would be prepared for them by the Goddess’ hand, using his tails to help open the door without jostling his young love. However, it seemed as he stepped inside, they were no longer i the bathroom of the Kariudo household, but instead at one of the celestial cleansing pools of the temple. It was quiet, isolated, the very air seemed to soothe the soul, as if it pushed away any air of negativity that may have followed from the outside world.
Taking a breath to steady himself, he moved inside the room, laying her down gently as he carefully undressed her, speaking softly to her so she knew what was happening, even if she didn’t react, reassuring her that he was there for her. He somewhat uncaringly removed the most difficult of his own clothing that might cause difficulty, but his mind was more focused on Rodessa to care if his own clothing got ruined beyond that.
Once they were ready, he picked her up once more, respectful of her naked form and moved to the bath, carrying her inside*
Huxian: Do you remember? When I first came to Paradias, you saved me. Though I had been standing on the edge of an abyss, a demon instead of a celestial being, you came to me and offered your hand. You have me the strength to turn from that abyss, to come into the light your soul seemed to shine so brightly. You brought me here, where I could shed the darkness that clung to my soul. You believed in me.
*As he had been speaking, he gently washed the girl, not sexually, but as if she were more precious to him than anything. With gentle fingers, he ran through her we hair, gently massaging her scalp and soothing the long strands.*
Huxian: This time, it’s my turn to believe in you. Though there may be an abyss before you, you are not alone. There is a way for you. My hand is here. All you need to do is take it. No matter what, I’ll stay by your side. Forever.
*The water around the two, seemed to shimmer, and a ghostly reflection of the past seemed to mimic, the two. Huxian stared at the couple before him one was a familiar face ‘Rozyus’ with a unfamiliar man. He looked at peace, dipping the the boy under, the cleansing pool washing away the filth from the boy and him waking up, Huxian began to mimic the ghostly images actions.*
Huxian: With that as my vow...shall we walk this path together? For I will never leave your side so long as you need me. My life is bound to yours, now and always.
*With those words Huxian walked deeper into the pool, the light of the pool cleansing the filth they both possessed. Once the light had faded Huxian walked back up to the surface, the girl began to stir slightly in his arms, before her eyes fluttered open. Huxian’s breath hitched. Never had he seen anything more beautiful than her eyes once more aware of the world, looking up at him, aware of him once more*
Rodessa: *Tired eyes* Hue?
*Relief flooded him. Ears perked up at the sound of her voice, he cradled her close to him*
Huxian: Ro...Thank goodness...You came back to me...Thank goodness…
Rodessa: *Looked down* I… Im sorry… I’m sorry… I made you sad… I not a very good lover...am I?
I promised to protect your smile and yet… I made you sad, with my troubles… Please forgive me.
*The girl bowed her head, looking somewhat dejected. Huxian, however, shook his head, cradling hers with a hand as he rested his cheek against her damp hair*
Huxian: The thing about being lovers is that’s not a one sided relationship, but a partnership. You have always stood by me when my troubles plagued you. Now it’s my turn to be the rock to help you weather the storm. That you’re here, by my side right now, that’s where I’m happiest. How could I possibly smile if I allowed you to suffer in silence?
*He shifted away, brushing her hair from her face with his hands before cupping her cheeks, the way he had done earlier. Though he was crying, they were not tears of hopelessness, but relief, joy, love*
Huxian: It’s as I said before, my place is at your side. My happiness is with you. That’s all that matters to me. So, whenever things get tough, let me support you. If you ever need to cry, let me comfort you. Through the bad times and the good. We’ll face the challenges together.
Rodessa: *Faint Blush* Hue… It sounds… like you're proposing…
Huxian: Maybe I don’t have a ring or permission to do so yet, but even so, I want to be by your side.
*His fingers brushed the faint mark at her neck*
Huxian: It’s like this mark. It’s a promise. My place is with you.
Rodessa: *Cute smile* Hue!
*The girl kissed Huxian, rubbing their noses together as they snuggled closer; a small white Kit wandered into the room yipping to get there attention.*
Kit: Yip! Yip!
Rodessa: *Resisting the urge to pet the kit* Cute!!!
*Blinking slightly, Huxian glanced over. Though it sounded like the fox was merely making vulpine sounds, Huxian’s mind translated them easily. Considering his origins, it was practically a first language*
Huxian: What do you need to give us?
Kit: Yip Yip Yip!!!
*The small animal guestered to the black box that was fastened to its back. Bemused, yet with a feeling he knew what might be inside the box - the fox’s words hinting as much, enough that pink touched his cheeks that had nothing to do with the warmth of the water - Huxian reached over, taking the box from the kit’s back, opening it to look inside. A simple ring looked back to him, a small diamond glimmering in the light. His cheeks definitely turned red then. Rodessa looked down her lips drawing into a thin line as she attempted to hide her embarrassment.*
Rodessa: *Blush* P-people need to stop listening into our conversations…
Venus Voice: YOU’RE WELCOME!!!
Pareme Voice: Hush! You are ruining the mood. Now, my children. You may use that room without interruption. Carry on as you were, you ‘crazy kids’
Huxian: *Blushing*...Sometimes I wonder if our lives are the soap operas for deities…
Venus Voice: Well, you're not wrong there, fluff.
Rodessa: *Facepalm* Will you leave us alone!!!
Parame Voice: Sorry, sorry. We're leaving now.
*Huxian focused, using his own power just to be sure, only relaxing once he could no longer feel the heavenly presences*
Huxian: Gods… *Shaking his head*
*Trying to turn the mood back to its previous state, Huxian sat Rodessa down on the edge of the pool, eyeing the ring for a moment, and deciding it wouldn't do. He decided to ‘reforge it’ into something more suited to her, using his own power as the forge. Finally, he took her hand and pressing it to his lips*
Huxian: Rodessa, will you accept my promise? To remain by your side, from now, for always?
Rodessa: *Happy smile* I...I do… if that is what you wish… I do. I want to be with you forever.
Huxian: *Warm smile* Then, with the gods as our witness...let this ring be our red string, tying our fates together until the end of time.
*Carefully, he slipped the ring onto her hand, a physical manifestation of their promise, forged by Huxian’s flame and Huxian’s hand. It slipped onto her finger, settling there as if it would fit no hand but hers.
Rodessa: Hue… Thank you.
[END]
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